Toilet Training

To my female friends
What I am about to reveal might completely wipe out your fantasies about your prince charming. Beyond all that good looks, academic achievement, career success, he might still need toilet training.

The male’s anatomy is made in such a way that physical contact is really necessary during urination, well unless he enjoys getting his pants wet. Here’s the revelation: Most guys DO NOT wash their hands afterwards. What is a little bacteria and a little odor in the hands going to bother anyone? Now that you’ve been warned, when you summon a guy to bring you some food, or shake his hand, do ensure that you have a sanitizer readily nearby.

How do I know? Your highness here (that’s me) happens to be a male, and uses the male toilet all the time. Backed by more than 40 years of experience and observation, you can rest assure that my words are absolutely true.

Most guys never lift up the toilet seats when they urinate. That’s okay if everyone is a marksman. Unfortunately men are always over confident. We aim far but always fall short. Don’t expect anyone will clean up the mess they made. Just pity the next guy who needs to use the toilet with the seat down.

Animal instinct prevails too. It is crime against nature for guys to flush the toilet after use. No one does that over his dead body. Have you seen a pig cover his dung? No. They just stand up and go. So beware if you are getting married and sharing the toilet with your husband. Just ensure that toilet training is in your list of Dos and Don’ts. It is logical to assume people behave the same in public toilets as well as in their home toilet. If they don’t, it means two things:

1) they are badly educated, uncultured and uncivilized barbarians.
2) they need their mothers or wives to be present all the time.